Hedef Metal Gadgets

Relationship communication problems are very common. There are a number of ways we can look at what these basic relationship problems are all about.

One of the first things to say is it seems men are primarily responsible for the issues associated with marital and relationship problems to do with communication.

I imagine a lot of men reading the last sentence would become very defensive about that statement and think it is another example of male bashing.

On the other hand there is every chance many women reading it would identify with what is said and wholeheartedly agree with the statement.

Adele Horin, a columnist in the Sydney Morning Herald, writes about relationship communication problems. She says there is a “..shortage of men that women can relate to. The crisis in male-female conversation cries out for more attention. Relationships are being destroyed, or aborted at first date…”

She goes on “Say a woman has found a man… Before long she has detected the fatal flaw. ‘He just doesn’t listen. He won’t talk to me.’ She thinks it is an individual problem, and that a more sympathetic conversational mate can be found..But this conversational crisis is bigger than any individual. It is gender-wide. And it starts young.”

Boys imitate the modeling of other men and she says, “..boys – with exceptions of course – soon develop the minimalist style mothers, girlfriends and wives despair of.”

A male reader responded to Adele’s column in the letters page of the “Herald”. He wrote, “..The fact is women are terrible communicators.”

He added, “Women arrogantly take the stance that their way is superior, against all the evidence, and refuse to be rational, constructive and inclusive. Instead of trying to change male behavior to suit themselves – a tactic that seems to be failing – perhaps it would be better to accept their own shortcomings and work on modifying them.”

Can you imagine the relationship communication problems experienced with someone like this man. I think he is so extreme and when I first read it I thought he might have been saying all this with his tongue in his cheek, but I don’t think so. I think he is serious.

Horin asks the question about how men are like this when she says, “Who knows how these patterns are established?”

I have some idea how it has happened and I will explain this and show how it has created relationship communication problems.

There has been a widespread belief in the world that men are superior to women. This was the accepted view for thousands of years. Some think this is no longer the case, yet there is ample evidence to suggest it is still firmly in place.

It is not my intention to expand on this here, but simply to state it as a fact. I am now going to show how this has impacted males to bring about the conversational crisis.

If, as males, we see ourselves as superior, this places us on a higher level and women on a lower level. On the whole, men seem unable to feel equal to women: they must be superior or they are inferior.

It’s like a competition, it is win/lose. If I’m not in charge or on a higher level, then she will be, and I’ll be on a lower level and she’ll be in charge, and it’s not supposed to be like that.

So when it comes to relationship communication problems, it is paramount men demonstrate how the proper structure is in place. What better way of doing this than not listening or taking any notice of women.

It is like men might as well be saying, “who do you think you are, you are not on my level, I don’t have to listen to you, or acknowledge you. You don’t count anyway, so what you have to say is not important.”

When we listen to others, we are acknowledging they are on the same level, and are equally important to us.

Other aspects of this are, when it comes to feelings, if we see ourselves as being superior, it follows we are above all that. It’s okay for you inferior lot to get caught up in that rubbish, as that is the stuff of weaklings, but we are not like that.

The other matter related to this that creates relationship communication problems, is the issue of the ability to understand and share the feelings of another – in other words empathy.

Men are notorious for their lack of empathy. It is just like the listening question. Given women are inferior and therefore don’t count, why should men be concerned about how they feel, because women don’t matter.

This is the only way I have been able to make sense of these relationship communication problems. I’m sure many women can identify with my explanation, and I hope I have given men some things to think about, and how they can make changes.

COMMUNICATION may just be a 13 letter word but as far as its importance goes there is very little that we gain without effective communication. As the saying goes “It’s easy to dream but making dreams come true is what really counts. In a similar way its easy to be a communicator but to be an effective one is what really counts… to some its definitely an inborn skill and some strive hard to build it.

Its not always that we end up having a perfect communication…either there is a misunderstanding… confusion… or some or the other reasons due to which things turn out to be really sour…

Communication is basically of two major types…Verbal and Written…we can really follow some basic rules to make these two communications really effective.

Effective Verbal Communication

First impression is the last impression – Many a times we might have heard this being said but little do we actually realize the importance of the phrase. It’s very important to create an impression before any conversation… it helps to make it smooth.

Know the details of your conversation – It is very essential to know the details of your conversation. From the purpose of the conversation to what results are you expecting out of it… all this is very vital. In case of a “formal conversation” be well prepared from before… in fact try to go a step ahead knowing the taste and interest of the person you going to interact with. In fact try to make the communication a total learning process.

Be a patient listener – As easily the word “patient listener” goes, its not always easy to be one… but to make verbal communication effective its always necessary, otherwise you tend to miss out on the important information and offend the person sitting opposite you.

Stop being a liar – Be very genuine with your words keeping in mind that the person/s sitting opposite you is as clever as you think yourself to be. Your pretensions if exaggerated might get caught and ruin all your big hopes.

Presence of mind – It is indeed a hard virtue to follow, but the absence of it is sure to ruin all your supposedly good plans. So to make your communication really effective make sure that you don’t miss out on a single point, in fact give all possible suggestions so as to ensure that you are taking an interest in the conversation.

Know to handle – When a conversation is at its peak, especially in case of a formal one, and if you feel that it could turn boring at any moment, quickly sneak in a healthy humor or a funny incident that happened recently… so very connected to the topic you were talking on all this while

Try not to be a forgetful goat – Its sounds funny but its not all that funny… remembering the points and information’s that you discussed a while ago is very necessary… its helps to make future communications more effective… and most importantly try your best not to forget the names. People appreciate if you remember their names, especially when you are introducing them to someone else in future.

Be clear with you conversations – Just don’t converse merely for the sake of it. Reduce on your speed of talking… its helps the other person to follow what you are saying. Clarity is very essential.

Effective Written Communication

Purpose of your writing – Always be very clear with the purpose of your writing. Is it a favor that you are asking for or is it a favor that you are doing for somebody. Is it an invitation for your new business venture or one for the kitty party you going to throw very soon.

Clarity and proper use of words – Be very sure not to scribble around the paper you writing on… clarity is a must. Your content should also be precise and clear enough for the reader to understand.

Respect to the reader – Give due respect to yours as well as the readers point of view. Never be over judge mental, for it might offend the reader to a great degree. This is a very essential point. Ignoring this might land you into serious trouble…may be leading to a cancellation of the merger which seemed so obvious, till you had written that letter.

Well all these methods of communication if kept in mind is enough for you to strike the biggest deal of your life or may be regain that long lost friend whom you had lost because of one of your own stupidity. When you communicate make sure no ear dares to be distracted.

Nursing is a caring profession. It is also a profession that is more and more evidenced based in practice. In as much as the scientific aspects of nursing is increasing due to the complex technological advancement of medicine and the machinery that is used at the patients bedside, the fact remains that the nurse is the first person that the client usually comes in contact with in any emergency or hospital setting.

Having said this, the term, “caring” is an essential emotion that all nurses, for that matter, all individuals in the health profession must possess. With caring comes the trained ability of the nurse to facilitate therapeutic communication. One might ask, what is therapeutic communication? To better answer this question, the term communication should first be defined.

Communication can be defined as “The Process of transmitting messages and interpreting meaning.” (Wilson and others, 1995) With therapeutic communication, the sender, or nurse seeks to illicit a response from the receiver, the patient that is beneficial to the patients mental and physical health. Just as stress has been proven to adversely affect the health of individuals, the therapeutic approach to communication can actually help. In any given situation everyone uses communication.

Everyone has seen the individual that looks like they are either angry, stressed, feeling ill or maybe sad. These emotions are communicated to others not always by words, but by gestures and facial expressions. A nurse must always be aware of these expressions in clients, for these expressions may be the only way that the nurse can tell if there is something else going on that needs their attention. The term given to this type of non-verbal communication is called, meta-communication. In meta-communication, the client may look at their amputated stump and say that it doesn’t really look that bad, while at the same time tears are rolling down from their eyes.

In a case such as this the nurse should stay and further explore how the person actually feels. There are many factors associated with the healing and comforting aspects of therapeutic communication. Circumstances, surroundings, and timing all play a role in the effect of therapeutic communication. If a client is being rushed down for an emergency surgery there might not be time for a bedside conversation, but the holding of a hand could convey much more than words to the client at such a moment.

Ideally, for therapeutic communication to be effective the nurse must be aware of how they appear to the client. If a nurse appears rushed, for example, they are speaking quickly, their countenance looks harried, and they are breathing heavily, their eyes not on the client but perhaps on an intravenous bag on the client in the next bed. In a case like this, there is nothing that this nurse could say to the client in a therapeutic manner that the client would believe. The helping relationship has not been established and therefore therapeutic communication cannot be facilitated. Some of the emotions associated with therapeutic communication include but are not limited to the following: Professionalism, Confidentiality, Courtesy, Trust, Availability, Empathy, and Sympathy. (Potter, Patricia A., Perry, Anne G., Co. 2003, Basic Nursing Essentials for Practice, pg. 123, Mosby)

All of these emotions go into the client nurse relationship, which must be established by the nurse as soon as possible upon first meeting the client. To begin to establish this nurse client relationship, the nurse must assess the overall message that the client is communicating to the nurse, such as fear, pain, sadness, anxiety or apathy. The nurse should be trained in keying into the message that the client is sending. Only then can the nurse determine the best therapeutic approach. Anyone that has to be thrust in to a hospital or emergency room environment has level of anxiety.

This level can go up considerably when the client feels that they have been abandoned or that there is no one there that really cares about how they feel. When a client is the recipient of therapeutic communication from a caring individual, a level of trust is achieved and more than, that the clients entire countenance can change for the better. Their blood pressure, respirations and levels of stress can simultaneously decrease. When this takes place, the management of pain, if any is involved, can be resolved more quickly. The goal for a nurse is to become proficient in the medical.